The Omega Incident
by JM Prescott
Summary: A Reaper Dreams Prequel: Nineteen year old Kaidan Alenko had a simple assignment from Commander David Anderson: Mentor a young, traumatized biotic, and help her acclimate to her new implants. Unfortunately for Kaidan, seventeen year old Josslyn Shepard was the antithesis of simple.
1. Anderson

_A novelette prequel for Reaper Dreams - I wanted to cover some more of Joss Shepard's past as well as give Kaidan Alenko a little story time. I have twelve short chapters planned... just something to break up the heavy stuff that I've been writing through in the main story. I hope you all enjoy._

* * *

Annapolis Maryland

September 6th, 2171

* * *

Kaidan Alenko stood beneath the trees and took a deep breath, inhaling the sweet scent of sycamores mingled with the semi-brine smell of the western bay. It was a direct contrast to Gargarin station. Condensation was a major issue on a large space station, thus Gargarin's environmental controls maintained seven percent humidity. It was dryer than a desert—complete hell on his sinuses, which made his headaches all the worse. Here on the western shores of Chesapeake Bay, he felt damn near human again.

Kaidan Alenko was from the Pacific Northwest; Vancouver Island to be specific. His parents maintained an apple orchard, which had become a lucrative business since Humanity had become part of Council Space. As it turned out, many alien species were fond of apples, especially Asari. The price of earth-raised apples had skyrocketed in recent years, and his parents were becoming quite wealthy as a result. It was strange to imagine aliens across the galaxy drinking cider from the trees he'd grafted as a child.

The new world, rather the new universe, was a majestic place, and Kaidan planned to explore as much of it as he could. His biotics, for all their pitfalls, were essentially a first class ticket to the stars. Unfortunately, the grand adventure hadn't started like he imagined. His L2 implants had been trouble from the start, severe headaches and nosebleeds, and unlike the L1's, they were damn near impossible to remove without life-risking surgery. BAaT1 training, his first real adventure, had been a grueling ordeal. It had also gone sour in the end.

Kaidan brushed recent events out of his head. It wasn't healthy to dwell on the things that hadn't worked out. He was only nineteen. It was time to move forward, and his luck had already turned for the better. Alliance NMOTC2 for all North American inhabitants had recently been moved from San Antonio to Annapolis. He'd missed the desert assignment by a few months and landed in the coastal school instead. It was a hell of a stroke of luck: trees, grass, and best of all, humidity.

The first few days of classes were a breeze compared to BAaT. It was also much more interesting, especially since a rudimentary understanding of alien biology was required. A modern corpsman couldn't pass certification without being able to render fundamental first aid to any Council species member. Kaidan had even gone the extra mile to enroll in advanced exobiology courses. He would learn the correct procedures for dozens of non-aligned species, including Krogan and Quarians.

Considering those two races were on the verge of extinction (there were less Quarians in the entire galaxy than there were humans living in the states that bordered the bay in front of his eyes), he probably wouldn't have the opportunity to use this knowledge, but it was exciting nonetheless. Kaidan prided himself on being knowledgeable and well-rounded. His father had always told him to drive on a goal; if you are going to do something, do it all the way—never half-ass it.

There was no point in doing it any other way, especially here. The students who were complaining didn't realize how good they had it. A little extra study work was a fair exchange for grass under one's toes and the balmy moist air of the bay. He inhaled again deeply through his nose. The last remnants of this morning's headache faded into a minor prickle at the stem of his neck.

A man's voice, distinctly deep and resonating, boomed in his ear, nearly startling him out his wits.

"Ah, yea, those trees sure do smell good, don't they, Alenko? Especially if you know what it's like to be cooped on a space station for months at a time," said the man.

Kaidan turned about and stared into the face of an officer in full dress. He was a large man, black, strong jaw, smallish hooded eyes, and triangle nose with a large base. His mouth was turned down at the corners, rendering his smile damn near melancholic. Remembering himself, Kaidan dropped his books, snapped to attention, and saluted.

"Sir!" he said.

"At ease, Alenko," said the man.

He offered his hand. Kaidan took it.

He nodded with approval. "Good handshake son. The name is Anderson, Commander David Anderson. I've been watching you Alenko, I'm impressed."

"Uh, thanks, Sir," said Kaidan.

"You're going to make a fine officer one day, Alenko. I'm certain of it," said Anderson. "I wonder though, why did you choose Corpsman? Your biotic tests are off the charts, your marksmanship is solid, and all your physical and mental evaluations grade out elite. You should be enrolled in ITC. You'd have a real shot at N7."

"I appreciate that, Sir," said Kaidan. "I was headed in that direction for some time, but recent events have changed my mind. I'm not excited about Special Forces. I think I can do more good here."

Anderson nodded. "Once you kill a man it changes your perspective doesn't it?"

"Yes, Sir," said Kaidan. "I've no appetite for it, that's for sure."

Anderson let out a short sigh. A hint of sadness briefly played across his face before he neutralized it, then replaced it with a slight smile. Kaidan felt an affinity for the man almost at once.

"On to business, would you mind doing me a favor, Alenko?" asked Anderson.

"You name it, Sir," said Kaidan.

"There's a student here at Annapolis who's acclimating to her biotics. She just got her L3 implants a few weeks ago. I'm a little worried about her," said Anderson.

Kaidan was confused. "Sir, they have all kinds of military trainers who can handle that sort of thing. I don't know how much help I'd be."

"She's not in the military, Alenko, not yet. She's just seventeen, waiting to muster in," said Anderson. "But she's already ahead on her officer credentials—doing all the right coursework. Also, a bit of a hitch. She was on Mindoir, I'm sure you've heard about it."

Kaidan nodded. "Oh, shit, yea, sorry, Sir, I heard all about it—damn Batarians."

Anderson continued. "It seems she discovered her biotics during the whole incident. She lost her family, her friends, and she sustained some serious wounds—they're healed now, but, the other stuff, the stuff inside her head and heart, that's still raw and bloody. Her instructors have had trouble reaching her. I figure, someone around her own age, someone she might look up to, well, you know, I just want to see the kid make it."

Kaidan understood. "I'll do my best, Sir. Where does she stay?"

"You can find her in the Sloan-Gifted, the early start dorms, just off campus. She's got some classes here, as well as some others over at St. Johns. She's always on the go, so your best chance to track her down is catch her in her room between six and nine in the mornings. She tends to sleep in as much as she can," said Anderson. "I've already cleared you with her resident advisor."

"How did you know I was going to agree to this?" asked Kaidan.

Anderson grinned. "Who's going to turn down a favor from an officer who might get you on a ship one day?"

Kaidan smiled. "Point taken, Sir. I'll remember to track you down when make captain."

"You do that, Alenko," said Anderson. "Oh, and one last thing, the student's name is Shepard, Josslyn Shepard. She's a tall girl, over six foot already, and built like a brick shithouse, so don't tangle with her if you get off to a bad start. What else, right, red hair and the temperament to match, green eyes; a bit of a looker. Careful you don't get sucked into her schemes. She has a way with people."

Kaidan sighed inwardly. Why did it have to be red hair and green eyes? He nodded his acknowledgement to Anderson, then saluted the man before he took his leave. Picking up his books, he set out to his next class. He had plans to go to the dance tonight with his friend, Ellard. Apparently there were a pair of lovely twins that cadet Ellard had been working on and he needed a wingman. Kaidan was game.

* * *

 _I know some of you are wondering, why books? Don't worry, it will be explained in a few chapters. :)_

Up Next: The Dance


	2. Dance

_I was hoping to post the newest chapter of Reaper Dreams but I wanted to rewrite a few sections, so expect it late Saturday/early Sunday. This was already done, so something light for a Friday night._

* * *

Annapolis Maryland

September 6th, 2171

22:30

* * *

As far as military academy dances went, this one was off the rails. The scene was frenetic. The music pounded at his ears aggressively, inducing a mild headache. Kaidan wasn't sure of the exact style, but it wasn't to his taste. The percussion was driving rather than rhythmic, there was no melody to speak of, and it looped in on itself in a rising crescendo of harsh distortion. Fortunately, he had never been much for dancing so the music gave him the perfect excuse to find a dark corner to slide into. He always felt better with a wall at his back and a clear view of what was in front of him.

What he saw was a churning throng of sweaty cadets looking to work out their early semester stresses and jitters. Ellard had disappeared a few minutes earlier with a promise that he'd finally track down the twins. Kaidan sipped his drink and took it all in.

Someone shouted into his left ear. "Not much of a dancer, eh, Kaidan?"

Kaidan turned to the speaker and recognized one of his classmates. There was an uncomfortable lag while he stared at her blankly. She was a short girl with dusty hair and tons of freckles. She had an infectious smile. Then he remembered they were in decontamination together. He wasn't sure how, but he was able to salvage his manners by sifting a name out of the murk in his head.

"Oh, hey, Helen," he shouted back. "I can dance, but this isn't my type of music."

"It's called Dark Machina," she yelled. "It's the new Goth!"

Kaidan laughed. "I think I missed the old Goth!"

Helen rolled her eyes. "We all did, Alenko!"

Kaidan had no idea what she was talking about, so he just went with a smile and a nod. He didn't feel much like filling the air with empty conversation, much less shouting it, so he turned his attention back to the crowd in front of him. It was then that he spotted two beautiful girls who looked suspiciously like the twins that Ellard had been going on about. Both girls were hanging off the arms of some crazy Amazonian in an outfit that could best be described as an eyesore.

The dress, or rather, garment, was aqua colored and dotted with pulsing, neon-blue sequins. It was scandalously short, had a neckline that plunged all the way to her belly, and sheer enough to reveal that she was a she, and wore no panties. It was a clear violation of academy dress code, but thus far none of the monitors had pulled her aside. Perhaps they were too stunned to respond? Kaidan found himself bouncing between incredulous disbelief and a sort of bemused awe.

Aside from the dress, his eyes were drawn to a pair of large, sensational lips protruding out of a mess of bright blue hair. He wasn't sure if it was natural hair that had been teased and colored, or a wig, but it was every bit as atrocious as the dress she was wearing. The entire garish ensemble was built upon a foundation of white, vinyl thigh-high boots with ten inch heels. The woman's balls, while physically absent, were quite large and definitively present in the metaphorical sense.

Helen, who still stood to his left, shouted again. "There's a girl with serious daddy issues!"

Kaidan turned to her. "Why do you say that?"

Helen leaned in close to his ear so she didn't have to shout so loud. "There are always three types of girls on the dance floor, Alenko. Girls who dance like they have a daddy, girls who dance like they don't have a daddy, and finally, girls who hate their daddy. That there, that's a daddy hater if I ever saw one!"

Kaidan laughed. "Where did you come up with that? What about moms, don't they count? My mom is pretty great."

Helen sneered. "Oh, sure, all moms are great with their boys, or else spoil the shit out of them, and yea, they can be great when daughters are young, but as soon as you hit puberty, she's no longer just your daughter, she's your competition! That's when it gets ugly. All women are essentially jealous of each other, so when you mature into a woman, that's when you need your father the most."

Kaidan was skeptical. "Sounds like more of a personal issue than a general observation."

"Maybe," said Helen. "Or I'm just biased because I'm definitely in the first category. My dad is career military, couldn't be around all the time, especially after my mom kicked him out, but he's always been there for me, you know? Always taught me to respect myself, carry myself with dignity."

Kaidan nodded in the direction of the blue hair. "So you're saying she has no dignity?"

"None at all," said Helen. "But, hey, she'd be an easy lay if you're into that type of thing."

Kaidan stared at her dance partners. If those were the twins, well, he and Ellard were out of luck.

"Seems like guys aren't on her menu, though," said Kaidan.

"You disappointed?" asked Helen.

"A little bit," admitted Kaidan. "I think one of the girls she's with was supposed to be my date."

Helen pointed out a monitor who was headed straight towards the dancing trio. "If it makes you feel any better, I think she's about to get busted, and a dress code violation like that could get her expelled from school."

Kaidan took another drink and watched the Amazonian drift to the edge of the room, finally exiting with the twins just before the monitors closed in. He couldn't decide whether her timing was luck or intuition. Ellard showed up a few minutes later looking dejected.

He shrugged. "Sorry, Alenko. I can't find them. I don't know what happened."

"So, these girls: olive skin, long black hair, big brown eyes, and curvy?" asked Kaidan.

Ellard perked up. "Yea, that's them, did you see them?"

Helen laughed at Ellard. "Long gone, Tom!"

Ellard turned to her. "Oh, hey, Lowe!"

"I think Helen is right. They just went out the doors with… well, they left a few minutes ago," said Kaidan.

"Man, why didn't you say something?" complained Ellard.

"Long story for another time," said Kaidan. "Anyway, I'm working on a headache, so I think I'm going to call it a night. I've got an early morning."

Ellard exaggerated a sad face. "Shit, you're giving up just like that? Look at this place it's packed!"

Helen grabbed his arm. "You heard him, Tom, he has a headache, but I don't. How about you dance with me?"

Ellard shrugged. "Ok, sure."

Kaidan watched them weave out to the middle of the dance floor before he hit the exits. It was just as well that his evening didn't work out, because he hoped to make a good first impression with the young biotic that Anderson had entrusted to him. Before his head hit the pillow, he programmed it into his schedule. Shepard: 0700.

* * *

 **Next: Shepard**


	3. Shepard

_There's a few gems in here for people who really know their Mass Effect lore... and for everyone who's reading Reaper Dreams, there's some call forwards, specifically to Shepard's recorded message that Garrus was listening to in "The Deep Dark"._

 _Hope you enjoy._

* * *

Annapolis Maryland

September 7th, 2171

07:00

* * *

Kaidan had never seen a swankier dormitory than Sloan-Gifted. The building, which was new construction, utilized all the latest technology. It felt more like a corporate office than a dorm. The bottom floor was filled with recreational rooms, a gymnasium, and a lounge with plush couches encircling a five meter high vid screen. There was a beverage bar, a small self-serve cafeteria, and front desk with three receptionists.

He approached the desk. One of the receptionists, a well-groomed man with a shaved head, was wearing a tactical style headset complete with state of the art retinal feeds and a voice filter. He appeared to be watching something on his visual feed, thus it was difficult to tell if he had noticed Kaidan's presence.

"Hey," said Kaidan.

The receptionist sneered. "Can I help you?"

Kaidan tried to remain polite. "I was looking for a dorm attendant. I need clearance to visit one of the students."

The receptionist laughed. "This is Sloan-Gifted, kid. There are no dorm attendants here, no roommates, no communal bathrooms, or any of the usual rub. They don't have curfews or any rules about who can visit them when."

Kaidan was bewildered. "How does that work?"

"Rich kids," said the man. "Not just rich, filthy rich. Their parents are in with the administration board, and they pay premium to put them up here, and we get a salary to babysit them, check in on their grades, and clean up all the messes they make."

"Sounds like a different kind of job," said Kaidan.

The man nodded. "I handle student resources, meaning: I brownnose their teachers, hire their tutors, manage their workloads, and do everything short of overt cheating to keep them in school. Garcia over there coordinates all their social lives, meals, laundry, all of that, and of course there's Raines here. Her title is guidance counselor, but she's actually a legal counselor. She keeps these privileged little bastards from being expelled or thrown in jail when they fuck up."

"Wow," said Kaidan.

"Yea," said the man. "This is how the upper crust lives. Credits talk, buddy, credits talk."

Kaidan wondered if Anderson got it wrong. Shepard was an orphan, not a rich kid.

He decided to give it a shot anyway. "So, Shepard?"

The man's mood improved almost instantaneously after hearing the name. "Ah, why didn't you just say so? I'm Rudy. Leave Shepard out of everything I just said. She's the outlier here, not really one of them, if you get what I mean. Ah, you probably know her deal. She's a fuckup to be sure, crazy as shit, but there's a reason for it. Other than that she's a hell of a kid. Is she expecting you? I have to be careful, she gets her share of snoops and stalkers."

Kaidan hoped that Anderson had talked to her. "I think she is. My name is Kaidan Alenko. I'm here to help her acclimate to her implants."

The man talked into his headset. Kaidan couldn't hear the conversation due to the noise cancelling on the mic, but there seemed to be no cause for alarm.

"You're in," said Rudy. "Wait five minutes before you go up, let her clean out her birdcage. Third lift, all the way to the fifteenth, it's the top floor."

"Which room?" asked Kaidan.

"Only one room up there," said Rudy. "It's the penthouse."

Kaidan gawked. "This place has a penthouse?"

Rudy nodded.

Kaidan shook his head. "Unbelievable."

He waited out the five minutes in the lobby. Just as he was about to step towards the elevator, the doors opened and two passengers scrambled out. It took a few seconds to register in his brain, but he recognized them, two girls, the pair from the dance—olive skinned, curvy figures, and long, dark hair, now disheveled. They were definitely twin sisters, and definitively hung over. They avoided Kaidan's stare as they made their way, arm in arm, to the building exit.

He stood dumfounded as he watched them leave. He had to be dreaming. It couldn't be. What were the odds? He tried to reconcile what Anderson had told him about Shepard with the spectacle he saw last night at the dance. Perhaps the whole thing had been a prank or a joke. Perhaps the sisters were Shepard's friends?

Once they were gone and the door closed behind them, laughter erupted from the front desk area. Kaidan deliberately moved closer so he could hear the commentary of the staff.

Fortunately, they weren't exactly whispering about it. "Damn, what is it about Shepard? I've seen a lot of girls doing the walk of shame off that lift, but that's new," said Rudy.

"What would you call that?" asked Garcia.

Raines snickered. "Let's go with double shame."

The three broke out into laughter as Kaidan stepped onto the lift. He was on the fifteenth floor so quickly that he didn't have time process what had just happened, so he found himself at Shepard's door, bewildered, confused, and unprepared when a female voice from above (presumably Shepard's) told him that said door was open. However, it didn't open and he couldn't see a button, or a control panel, so he just stood in front of it looking like a dumbass. Out of desperation he waved his hand around hoping it had a motion sensor. It was a shot in the dark that missed by a mile.

"Jesus, what the hell are doing? Push on the fucking door!" said the voice.

The door slid open with a soft hiss as soon as Kaidan touched it with his fingers. It was official now, he really was a dumbass.

Upon entering, the voice blared again. "I'm in the shower, be out in just a few."

Kaidan glanced around as the door slid shut. He found himself in a living quarters dominated by a large hideaway bed that was in the extended position. A tangle of sheets and pillows were piled on top. He thought about the two girls and tried his best to push any salacious thoughts into a dark corner.

The sour smell of spilled wine brushed his nostrils. He looked around the apartment and saw signs of a private party. In the far corner, near the dresser, he spotted the blue wig and the rest of the garish ensemble he'd witnessed at last night's dance. Around a low table of dark metal there was an array of strange black cushions. On the table was an empty pizza pouch, two empty wine bottles, and a carafe of blue liquor that was two thirds empty. There was also an old school deck of playing cards, an electronic pad, three empty glasses, and two pairs of black panties tied on a red ribbon.

' _Ok, so they weren't friends,'_ thought Kaidan, _'and Shepard takes trophies; tacky, really tacky. What is she trying to prove?'_

The place was nice, but the term penthouse was an overstatement. It was merely a nice apartment. Perhaps Rudy was using that term in context, comparing it to the average dorm room. The floor was clean, but the rest of the apartment was strewn with various mementos—a signed football, a baseball glove, several jersey's, a shelf full of children's toys, an old-fashioned tool kit, a bookshelf full of antique books (mostly religious or philosophical texts), and various other knickknacks. The walls were covered with photo panels of various sizes.

He drew near one of the panels and watched the changing display. There were family photos of children in various stages of life, three girls and a boy, along with captures of Mindoir colony life which portrayed a family farm and a chapel of some kind. It wasn't long before he worked out that Shepard was probably the oldest of the children depicted in the images, though none were recent so he couldn't be absolutely certain. They appeared to be a happy family, though the father seemed to be a dour and imposing figure.

"Coming through," said a voice from behind him. "I need to grab some clothes out of the dresser."

He turned around as he heard a wall panel slide open. A drawer had ejected from one of the recesses near the vid screen. As Shepard retrieved some garments from the drawer, he noticed that she was wearing nothing but a pair of socks and panties. Kaidan blushed several shades of crimson as she dressed in front of him. Several awkward heartbeats passed before he snapped his head in another direction.

He apologized. "Shit, I'm so sorry."

"Christ on a cracker, they're just tits," said Shepard. "I thought you were military?"

"Ah, yea, I'm in the Alliance," he mumbled.

Shepard snorted. "You do realize that half the ships we'll serve on have common lockers and showers?"

"Yea, well, I haven't been in that situation yet," said Kaidan. "So if it's just the same to you, I'll keep my head turned until you've finished dressing."

"Already finished," said Shepard. "Unless you're shy about bare shoulders as well."

Kaidan turned back to Shepard, relieved when he saw a cream colored tank top.

"Thanks," he said.

She shrugged indifferently.

Josslyn Shepard was a tall girl with a mop of red hair that edged a little closer to auburn than vermillion. She had a clean complexion, a darker skin tone than he was accustomed to seeing on a ginger, a dash of freckles, and exceptionally large, upturned emerald eyes.

He wasn't in the habit of judging people by appearance, nonetheless he felt compelled to overanalyze Shepard. There was simply too much going on in her face to look away. She was so alien to him compared to any other girl he'd ever met, that he felt much the same as he did when he first saw an Asari. Down the rabbit hole he went as he stumbled from one appraisal to the next, trying to work it out in his head.

All of the ingredients for exceptional beauty were on display in that diamond shaped face—a celestial nose, high-wide cheekbones, arched brows, puffy pink lips—yet something was wrong. The luminous green eyes were playful, but something sinister lurked just beneath the surface, like a rabid dog ready to take a bite. She had the mouth for it too. It was a little too large for her face, especially since her chin was a touch shallow. Her cheeks were soft and smooth, yet marbled with faint red lines, traces of scaring.

His stare caught her attention and she immediately feigned forgetfulness, muttering about something she needed in the kitchen while she quickly covered her jaw with her hand and turned her back on him. She fled to the kitchen to search the cabinets above the bar. As it turned out, she was tall enough that the cabinets over the bar concealed her face while she spoke to him.

"So, you're the new guy," she declared.

Kaidan hunched up. "Excuse me?

"Anderson keeps sending Alliance types my way, mostly biotics, thinks I need help adjusting," she said.

Kaidan went after it. "Well, do you?"

"Not really," said Shepard. "Hey, are you a Northern Lager or Silver Foam guy, oh wait, maybe something old school Canada like Molson or Moosehead?"

Her question took Kaidan off guard. "Uh, yea, old school, Moosehead."

Shepard pulled a glass out of the cupboard. A haptic display came up near the tap on the counter. She punched in a sequenced of numbers. Soon, a whirring sound commenced, the tap crackled with ice and condensation and poured out a frothy amber mixture. Once it was full, the glass left Shepard's hand, shot across the room without spilling a drop, and floated gently into his grasp.

Kaidan sighed. "Ok, that's just showing off, but I get the point."

He took a sip, it was nearly perfect.

"It has stock beer in the tank, then uses mass effect fields to alter the molecules so the taste adjusts to the brand I punch in. It came with over three hundred beers in the memory, and I can add more," she said.

"This is some college pad," said Kaidan. "How do you afford all this?"

"Being an orphan," said Shepard. "When your whole family gets slaughtered, you get the trust fund, the insurance, all the college funds, everything."

Kaidan tried to reign in his disapproval, but he couldn't shut his mouth. "Shepard, that has to last you the rest of your life, you don't want to blow it all and be out of credits in a few years."

"Not going to blow it all in a few years, because it's already gone," said Shepard.

Kaidan couldn't think of a suitable reply.

"I burned through it in a few months," said Shepard. "I didn't want it hanging over me. My dad was always on and on about the value of money and being a good steward, and how he was going to set me up and how I needed to be responsible and he'd show me the ropes and teach me to manage my money when I turned eighteen. Well, he isn't here, so I said, fuck it, and I spent it all. Got a nice place, a nice car, paid for my school, and now I'm done with it."

Kaidan felt a headache coming on. He rubbed his hand against his temple.

He didn't quite have the words for Shepard. "That sounds a little… uh,"

Shepard's tone became defiant. "Irresponsible? Yea, I've heard that before, but I'm going to be career military. I don't give a shit about credits or financial portfolios. Just give me a gun, some assholes to ventilate, and I'm happy."

What was it that Helen said last night at the dance?

' _That's a daddy hater if I ever saw one._ '

Kaidan took a shot. "Did your father want you to join the military?"

Shepard nearly howled with mock laughter. "Hell no! He hated the Alliance and anything to do with it. He was a pacifist, a naturalist, and when he wasn't working the farm, he was preaching from the pulpit. Ever heard of the Universal Church of Unity?"

"Only a few things, none of them very specific," said Kaidan.

"Or good, I bet," said Shepard. "It's mostly a lot of bullshit about all religions, even alien beliefs, bleeding into one, about reincarnation and space devils, and galactic cycles of extinction, and worse. There's some Volus with billions of credits who writes these books, and my dad used to exchange emails with the little lunatic. Don't get me wrong, I loved my parents, but they were into all kinds of crazy."

Kaidan was careful. "A lot of colonists hold to alternative belief systems."

Shepard "Yea, that's true. Every community on Mindoir had its own thing. You go out into deep space like that, risking your life and family just to get away from everyone else, you have to be a little different, and it's not all bad. There were a lot of great things about Mindoir. It was a beautiful place, and I was pretty lucky to grow up there. Not everyone on Earth has it so good, especially in the cities."

"Yea," said Kaidan. "Though I was fortunate where I grew up, Southwest Canada, out in the islands. My parents had an orchard."

"I read that," said Shepard.

Kaidan took another swallow of his beer. "Did your homework on me, I see."

"I got the name from Anderson, asked around, spent some time on the extranet," said Shepard. "Last two mentors he sent my way were total jerkoffs; couldn't stand them."

"Seems to be a pattern," said Kaidan. "Listen, Shepard, I don't want to cause you trouble or spy on you, it's just…"

"I get it," interrupted Shepard. "A guy like Anderson is a good connection to have. How about we make a deal, ok, Alenko?"

"What kind of deal?" asked Kaidan.

"You do your job without doing your job. We'll hang, do some biotic shit together, you'll report back to Anderson, and I'll tell him you're a real mensch and I couldn't have got through all this without you," she said.

"Sounds pretty close to what he wants," said Kaidan.

"What he wants is for me to become some girl scout," said Shepard. "You know, work out all my issues, pass my psychological profiles, and ascend through the Alliance ranks as a paragon."

"Sounds to me like he's doing you a solid, wanting that for you," said Kaidan.

Shepard stepped out from behind the counter. The thing he thought he saw behind her eyes before on full display and it was worse than he thought. They nearly flickered with green hatred. She took a step towards him, blazing with intensity.

"This is between you and me, Alenko, don't ever fucking repeat it. Can I have your word?" she asked.

"Yea," said Kaidan, foolishly, "My word, I promise."

"Ok, if you read the report it said that my family died in an artillery explosion, but that wasn't what happened, ok? They just struck it from my record, changed everything around so the press doesn't get ahold of it," she said.

"Why would they do that?" asked Kaidan.

"Because if humans ever knew what really went on down there, they'd feel like I do, and the Alliance would end up in a full scale war, and we'd be blowing Batarian ships out of space and bombing their colonies to ash," said Shepard. "But they don't want that, they want to suck up to the Council, make nice with all the rich aliens, especially the Asari, so we don't have to pay high tariffs."

Kaidan didn't like where this was headed. "What really happened, Shepard?"

She was smoldering. "They're slavers, Alenko, fucking four-eyed animals. They took children as slaves, branded them like cattle, and butchered anyone who looked too weak to be a slave. Any abomination you could dream up, they managed it and then some. They pillaged, they tortured, they murdered helpless people, old people, children, they…" she choked on the last word, "raped."

There was no lie in Shepard. Kaidan had heard stories from his friends, rumors. He'd always suspected, but this—he felt sick.

"I'm sorry," he said.

"It's a nice sentiment, but it doesn't do anything," said Shepard. "They'll do it again, it's what they do, and that's why I'm going to be Alliance."

"Shepard," said Kaidan. "Alliance doesn't do vengeance trips, they'll screen you out. You won't pass their tests. They have all kinds of ways to find out what you really think. They use VI's to administer polygraphs you can't fool."

"I know," said Shepard. "But I never would have gotten this far if I hadn't passed a muster of tests already. I'm on scholarship, and I'm going to be an officer—aiming for an N designation. A person can do what they set their mind to doing. My dad taught me that and it was one of the only things he was right about."

Kaidan stared at her, careful to stay away from the jaw this time.

She didn't flinch. "Do you know what they did, Alenko? They beat him to death right in front of me, with clubs. They smashed my father into a bloody pulp while he prayed to some God who wouldn't answer, while he begged for our lives, my mom, my brother, my sisters, and then it got worse after that, a lot worse."

"God, Shepard," said Kaidan. "I don't know what to say."

Shepard slipped her hands into her pockets. The rage emptied out of her and she became vulnerable. She was like a magnet pulling him in. Kaidan resisted the overwhelming urge to wrap his arms around her. It wasn't a good plan. It might lead somewhere else, and she was so… He had to be careful, really careful.

"Don't say anything, just be my friend, just report to Anderson that I'm all good, that I'm getting over shit, and I'll try not to make a liar out of you. I'll play nice, say the right things," she promised.

"Ok, Shepard," he said. "Just don't make a fool out of me."

She shook her head. "I won't, I'll be good to you. Stick around me and I'll make sure you get laid as often as you want."

Kaidan blushed. "Ah, yea, I don't think that's a good idea. Not what Anderson had in mind."

Shepard laughed. "Not me, idiot. I like girls, and I know a lot of girls who like me, and most of them still like boys, especially the tall, dark, and handsome type."

Kaidan glanced at the table with the wine glasses. "Right," he said. "Thanks for the… handsome, but, ah, I'm not so sure I'm cut out to be your wingman. Hooking up isn't really my thing, I'm more of a flowers and dinner kinda guy."

"Wow, a true romantic. Where did Anderson dig you up, some Prothean ruin?" Shepard winked. "Sorry, Alenko, all in good fun. I can respect that. Ok, I'll keep an eye out for an old fashioned girl, though I can't promise she won't come with a flowered dress and ringlets in her hair."

Kaidan laughed. "Where the hell did you come up with that?"

Shepard wrinkled her nose. "That's how my dad made us dress back on Mindoir, you know, girls should be girls and all of that."

"And it really wasn't your thing," assumed Kaidan.

"No, I was more of a long shorts and tank with no bra kind of girl," said Shepard. "The one who always had one of the other girls behind a tree with my head under her dress."

Kaidan nearly choked on the last of his beer. "That's, um, that's quite an image."

Shepard smirked. "Yea, well, if you can image what it's like growing up in a backwards, well-churched settlement full of repressed girls hitting puberty. Imagine this: our community was so strict that we weren't allowed to be around boys without a chaperone. Fortunately, for me, they didn't pay much attention to other girls."

"You were a busy bee, I bet," said Kaidan.

Shepard flicked her tongue suggestively. "Buzz, buzz, buzz!"

Kaidan was disappointed. He couldn't put a finger on why, after all, things couldn't have worked out any better for him. Shepard was safe, and that was a good thing for his career, a very good thing. So why couldn't he feel a genuine sense of relief?

He stared at her again, at the lovely little constellation of freckles across her cheeks and nose—at those beautiful green eyes, so fierce and fragile. She was so tall, but she seemed so tiny, she'd be light in his arms, and warm.

' _Stop it, you idiot_ ,' he thought to himself.

Shepard waved her hand in his face. "Earth to Alenko, come in, Alenko. Ah, shit, you're one of those," she said.

Kaidan shook his head. "One of what?"

"A daydreamer," said Shepard. "Like my brother, Johnny. You couldn't talk to him five minutes before he tuned you out and joined a platoon of his Turian brothers on some far off world."

"Turian brothers?"

"Another day," said Shepard.

She extended her hand. "So, Alenko, Kaidan, whatever you want me to call you. Do we have a deal?"

"Kaidan," he said. "And yea, I see no problem, we'll stick to your plan."

He shook her hand.

It felt like a betrayal of Anderson's trust, but he didn't know why. He was only doing what Anderson asked him to do—befriending Josslyn Shepard, helping her with her biotics, keeping an eye on her. He saw no reason he couldn't fulfill Anderson's request and still keep his promise to Shepard. He couldn't find the wrong in it, logically, yet he felt it, as sure as he felt something else that made no sense.

That was the problem with feelings. They were difficult to translate, and even more difficult to ignore.

* * *

Postscipt: Kaidan is wrong about one little detail - I won't give it away yet, but it has to do with DNA and all the crazy biotech of the future.

 **Next: Ride**


	4. Fast

_Last few months have been difficult. Since finishing Reaper Dreams my wife was diagnosed with cancer. It's been months of surgery and radiation, et. all of it exhausting. I've started writing Mass Effect: The Wraith Wars, and will release the first chapter in January._

 _Meanwhile, I've been working on my epic fantasy novels, doing a rewrite of Songweaver, and I am also writing an original Science Fiction novel. The fanfic is for friends who want to read my stuff online._

 _Anyway, back to teenage Joss Shepard, and young Kaidan Alenko, and their first mission..._

* * *

 **November 22nd, 2171**

* * *

Kaidan lugged his books out of Professor Ivanov's class, cursing as he almost dropped them. The curriculum was ridiculous. How in the hell was he supposed to read them by the end of the weekend? He was halfway down the walkway when a luxury shuttle pulled up to the curb. Music blasted, the skycar chirped. Other students were staring at him.

"Hey, Alenko, I think your girlfriend's here!" said Meyers.

Kaidan grumbled as he approached the skycar. Shepard poked her head out. He hadn't seen her in almost two weeks, and he wasn't really thrilled at the prospect. She'd made a fool out of him twice already, and probably cost him any chance he had of getting a recommendation from Anderson.

"Alenko," she shouted. "Get in!"

Kaidan put his books on the floor and climbed into the passenger seat.

Shepard laughed. "What the hell, Alenko? I know you're a bit old fashioned, but, books, really? Where did you get them, an antique store?"

"It's one of my professor's," said Kaidan. "The guy is a lunatic. It's a literature and humanities class, right? I took it because I have all this heavy science, and I wanted a bit of a break, but the prof has this notion, that if you read a piece of classical literature, it needs to be read on the medium of its era."

Shepard shook her head. "What's scary about it, is it almost makes sense."

The shuttle soared skyward, falling into a traffic lane. They accelerated quickly, though it was difficult to tell just by feel alone. Adjusting his seat, Kaidan settled in. "Damn, this thing is smooth."

"Cision Vetra Mk1," quipped Shepard. "Asari know their shit when it comes to shuttles."

Kaidan shook his head. "Do I even want to know what this cost you?"

Shepard smirked. "Yea, it was pricey, but it's fast. I like things that are fast."

"You're a little in love with excess," said Kaidan.

"Is that an observation or a judgement?" asked Shepard.

"More of an observation. The day I met you I saw the twins on the way out," he offered, hoping Shepard would bite.

"Oh, you mean Olivia," said Shepard.

"Uh, which one is that?" wondered Kaidan.

Shepard shook her head. "It's not what you think. Olivia is… special. Anyway, it's not really an open topic for discussion."

"Ok, I get it. None of my business," said Kaidan.

Shepard sighed. "Listen, Alenko, don't take it like that. I think of you as a friend. Anything you want to ask me about my love life, you know, sex, whatever, I'm ok with, but Olivia is a private person and it's complicated—understand?"

Kaidan nodded. "Ah, I get it. So you're just seeing one of them, and the other is what, not so crazy about the idea, or else jealous?"

Shepard grinned. "You just want to know if I slept with both of them, and the answer is yes, and yes, at the same time, and I still am, with both of them, but it's really not what you think. That's as far as I'm willing to discuss it."

Kaidan shook his head. "You say it's not what I think, yet you tell me it's exactly what I think, which means one or the other must be true."

Shepard shook her head. "No, it can be both. There are such things as paradoxes, Kaidan."

Kaidan smirked. "So Olivia isn't one sister or the other, but a paradox."

"Exactly," said Shepard. "She's a paradox."

"Cute," said Kaidan. "You know, most people would be bragging about getting with twin sisters, yet you try to slither out of it by turning it into a mind game, but I saw the panties set out on the table at your place like they were trophies or something. So what's your deal? Are you just afraid to admit you're a hound because of your religious upbringing?"

Shepard seemed genuinely pissed. "Fucking hell, Alenko, I can't believe you just put that on me. Underneath that sensitive little facade you wrap yourself in, you're just another certified dude, a male jackass with a bunch of adolescent fantasies rolling through your head, which I might add, is stuffed up your own ass in three different directions."

Kaidan laughed. "Ouch! So, I hit a hot button, I see."

Shepard flipped through three lanes of traffic while she admonished him. "First, those were my underwear. I'd just gotten my mail and opened it before you arrived. I'm not big on hitting shops, and I know exactly what fits, so I order my clothes off the extranet, got it? Second, who would brag about getting involved in a sick, incestuous kink? This is my life, Alenko, not some porn vid. I really care about her. And finally, when I said Olivia is a paradox, I meant it. If you knew the truth, which I am not at liberty to discuss, it would make perfect sense, and then you'd realize what a jerk you've been about the whole thing."

Kaidan sighed. "Uh, huh, ok, whatever…"

"You don't trust me," said Shepard.

Kaidan shook his head. "Not really."

Shepard flipped the shuttle's accelerator forward. Kaidan glanced around, noticing that landmarks were zooming by his window at an alarming rate of speed.

He groaned. "This isn't a colony world, Shepard. All Earth transports are locked into 4Q."

"Fuck the four quadrants," said Shepard.

She swiped at the haptic controls, increasing the shuttle's velocity even further.

Kaidan lectured her. "Shepard, knock it off. You'll be on the sky-grid in seconds and into penalty registration."

She tapped a silvery metal device near the console. "Not with this slick Salarian beauty right here."

The shuttle launched forward at ever increasing speed. Kaidan didn't really want to know how fast they were travelling, but he took a guess that they were moving in excess of five kilometers per minute, nearly double the speed of the fourth quad allowance. To make matters worse, they were still in a second quad zone.

"Shepard!" he protested, as they buzzed a row of barren trees near a field.

She ignored him, even when a bright red flash indicated a LADAR lock by a quad sensor.

Kaidan exhaled in dismay. "God, we're going to get arrested and I'll end up spending the night in a brig instead of studying."

"Quit freaking out," said Shepard. "We'll be fine."

Kaidan scanned the traffic lanes above them. "Shepard, you can't break the four, there's surveillance drones…"

As soon as he took his eyes off the sky, Kaidan realized the shuttle was dangerously close to the ground. A row of trees was closing, but just before they crashed into the trees, Shepard flipped the shuttle onto its side to fit it through the rows.

"Ah shit," he groaned.

Even with the inertia dampeners, Kaidan could feel the sideways pull of gravity on his body. The passenger window, which his right ear was nearly pressed into, was less than a meter from the ground. He grabbed the sides of his seat, and closed his eyes. Hopefully, Shepard was too focused on the controls to notice his fear.

' _Don't react, don't lose it. It will only encourage her and make this much worse_ ,' he told himself.

Shepard teased him. "You look a little nervous, Alenko."

He hoped to discourage her antics by not responding. Instead, the shuttle began to whine and rattle, as its engine core was pushed to the limit. He opened his eyes, realizing they were passing through a corridor of farm houses. It began to occur to him that he might actually die in this skycar.

His resolve broke. "Shepard, we're too close to the ground. If we hit even a small animal, we're dead!"

"Or that barn up ahead," said Shepard.

As the structure went from a small block on the horizon to a red wall that filled the whole window, Kaidan instinctively wrapped his arms around his head to prepare for the impact. It never came. Instead, the shuttle lurched up and over the barn, missing the roof by mere centimeters.

After they were clear of the barn, the skycar began to slow to a more reasonable speed. Kaidan tried to relax, but he found himself quite agitated.

"See, you can trust me," said Shepard.

Kaidan shook his head. "Not after what you just pulled. That was one of the stupidest stunts I've ever seen. Maybe you don't give a shit about your life, but I have plans for mine. This is the last time I get in a vehicle you're piloting."

"Don't be that way," said Shepard. "I was in control the whole time."

"Like hell you were," said Kaidan. "You're reckless, bordering on crazy. No recommendation is worth this. When we get back, I'm out. You can deal with whatever poor bastard Anderson shuttles in your direction."

"Sure, Alenko, whatever you want to do," she answered nonchalantly.

Kaidan craned his head in her direction. He couldn't help but notice the grin on her face. Anyone else would be trying to barter, talk him down, or at least they'd be worried he'd go through with it, but there wasn't a hint of concern on Josslyn Shepard's face. It pissed him off.

He snapped at her. "Why are you smiling about this? Don't you take anything seriously?"

Shepard shrugged. "I know you're a little rattled at the moment, but I was in control the whole time, just like I'm in control in this situation. You're not going to bail on me."

"How can you know that?" asked Kaidan.

"I just know," said Shepard. "You'll stick it through. Not because of Anderson, but because of me."

Kaidan glared at her. "You're really arrogant, aren't you?"

"Not arrogance, confidence," corrected Shepard. "Arrogance is a false confidence based on unproven assumptions. I don't presume anything. I've been in the pilot seat since I was five years old. I can pretty much handle any vehicle in the known galaxy."

"I don't care how experienced you are, that was dangerous as hell and illegal," said Kaidan. "What if someone had been walking or driving between those structures?"

Shepard shook her head. "That route we just flew? It's off grid, quarantined, biohazard area. About four hundred acres of nothing. The only thing we could have been cited for is trespassing. I've made that run at least three dozen times, and each time the adaptive pilot subroutine engaged, so even if I'd taken my hands off the controls, the shuttle's VI would have brought us through safely."

Kaidan was agitated. "You're still arrogant."

"Confident," said Shepard.

"And you're certain about what I will or won't do…"

"Yea," said Shepard.

"Why?"

Shepard sighed. "You really want me to say it, Alenko?"

"Shoot…"

"You're into me," said Shepard.

Kaidan did his best impression of incredulous. "What?"

"I'm not stupid, Alenko. I see the way you look at me," said Shepard.

"That's not…" Kaidan took a breath. "We're friends, and that's all there is. I get it, you're not into guys."

"You don't sound convinced," said Shepard. "I've been down this road before in different ways. There was this girl I was into for a while at school. Name was Karen, not my normal type, but it was fun for a few weeks, but when it was time to move on, she kept lingering, kept carrying the flame, you know, no stalking or crazy or anything like that, but she wasted most of the school year just hanging from my rafters like some fucking bat. It was such bullshit.

I didn't totally get it at the time, but my mom did her best to make it clear to me. She was a good person, and she was worried that I wasn't careful with other people's hearts. She never really approved of the way I'd pursue someone and then lose interest. Since she couldn't change my nature, she decided to impress upon me the value of honesty and transparency. So I've been honest to a fault ever since."

Kaidan was uncomfortable. "Shepard, you're making this sound like some kind of intervention."

"I just want to get it out there, Alenko," she said. "I don't want to put your heart through a blender."

Kaidan put his hand over his heart. "I'm touched by your concern."

Shepard shrugged. "Ok, wise ass, I'm being serious. You're a sweet guy, but I'm a fucking mess, in case you haven't noticed."

Kaidan laughed. "Truest thing you've said all day."

Shepard nodded. "I know, right? That's why I'm being straight with you. I'm trying to make it work with Liv because I adore her, but it's hard as hell on me. I'm starting to get restless. It's hard to commit to just one person."

Kaidan couldn't hold back his sarcasm. "Even if that person is a paradox?"

"Even if," said Shepard. "And Liv is more than a paradox, she's incredible in every way, a dream really. She's as special as they come, and if I can't fall in love with her, then I doubt anyone else in this universe has a chance."

Kaidan sighed. "You're taking all of this much too seriously. You're just a kid, Shepard. I wouldn't worry about deciding the course of your life yet."

Shepard shook her head. "That's just it, Alenko, I do have a set course. I've got big plans, and those plans preclude check-in baggage, hell, even a carry-on will slow me down where I'm going."

Kaidan glanced at the navigation console. "Speaking of destinations, why are we dropping into Manhattan?"

"Going to see my cousin," said Shepard. "He lives just north of Washington Square Park."

"Shit," said Kaidan. "That's the worst part of the city, these days, and in this car? We're liable to get jacked."

"He knows I'm coming," said Shepard. "He runs with a tough crowd, they won't fuck with us."

The shuttle dropped into a neighborhood that looked like a war zone. Moving north, they passed a group of kids that were geared up like a Batarian Death Squad. "Jesus, Shepard, are you sure this is a good idea?"

"Just stay close to me, and you'll be fine," said Shepard.

She parked the shuttle on a choked out street. Several youths standing nearby spotted them and ambled over. Kaidan shook his head. The youngest kids were probably around eleven or twelve, and the oldest couldn't have been a day over seventeen. She waved a pistol in their direction, while the other youths openly displayed weapons.

"Stay here," said Shepard.

Kaidan laughed. "You've got to be joking if you think…"

Shepard cut him off. "Cut the white-knight bullshit. I mean it, Alenko. Let me deal with this."

Shepard was out of the shuttle, shutting the door behind her before he could protest. He almost ignored her last piece of advice when the kids surrounded her, but before it got ugly, they melted away. The girl, who was apparently the leader, did some sort of hand thing with Shepard, indicating that they were good. Shepard rapped on the window, motioning for him to get out.

As soon as he was out, a brace of cold air hit him and the kids started heckling, calling all sorts of crud names. "Now there's a pretty plug," said the oldest girl.

He couldn't think of an appropriate reply, not that it mattered because they were up the steps and inside an old apartment building in short order. As the old metal door slammed shut behind them, Kaidan shook his head. "You really expect our ride is still going to be there when we get back?"

Shepard snorted. "Those kids are initiates, if that car is gone, they don't get in the gang."

"Shepard, who the hell is your cousin?" asked Kaidan.

"Willie Boyle," said Shepard. "He kinda owns this place."

Shepard hustled up the stairs, Kaidan followed. "So he's a gang member?" he asked.

"Leader," said Shepard. "Tenth Street Reds, he runs the whole show."

Kaidan groaned. "Goddammit, Shepard, what are we doing here? I'm trying to put together a solid resume."

"I need something from him," she said.

As they reached the next flight of stairs, Kaidan could hear the throbbing of music. Several armed men and women came into view. They were armed to the teeth and looked downright pissed.

The biggest guy, must have been near seven foot, blocked off the door. "Willie has what you need, Red," he said. "But this one here needs to wait outside."

"Right," said Shepard. She tossed Kaidan an amused look. "I'll only be a few," and then vanished inside.

Kaidan sighed and leaned against the wall. The big guy, lowered himself down to look Kaidan directly in the eye. His breath smelled like a bad dorm on a Friday night. "Stand up straight, little bitch," he said.

' _Nice,_ ' thought Kaidan. He was starting to feel like one of those throw away characters in a B grade vid, specifically, one of the guys who gets shanked in the 2nd act. He was there for about ten minutes while the goons at the door talked shit about him. Kaidan swore, if he got out of here alive, it was the last damned time he went anywhere with Shepard.

Minutes later she came out of the door looking pleased with herself. "Come on, 'pretty plug', she laughed. Let's go."

Down the stairs she went, Kaidan after her. "What's that even mean?" he asked.

Shepard laughed but didn't answer. After they'd gone through the front doors, and down the steps to the street, Shepard hung a hard right, headed west down the sidewalk. "Uh, Shepard," said Kaidan. "Your car's over there."

She shook her head. "Not my ride anymore. We'll have to walk over to Sixth to catch a cab home."

"Shepard," complained Kaidan. "My books are in your car."

She slowed down and looked back. "I'd have to go get the keys from Willie, do you want to wait for me while I do that?"

Kaidan shook his head. "Hell no."

Shepard grinned. "They'd be a pain to lug all the way to Sixth anyway. Why don't I just buy you a new set when we get back to campus?"

Kaidan was frustrated. "What the hell was that all about?" He wondered. "Don't tell me you sold your car to pay for red sand or some shit."

Shepard shot him an angry glance. "That'd be a hell of a lot of red sand… anyway, ease up, Alenko, I don't play small time games like that. I needed something more serious."

"What kind of mess are you caught up in, Shepard?" he asked.

"Not one of my own making," she said.

Kaidan stopped in his tracks. "You want help," he said. "That's why you drug me out here. Whatever it is you're doing, you want me in on it."

Shepard frowned. "That's not…"

Kaidan shook his head. "Cut the bullshit, Shepard. You wouldn't have risked me figuring any of this out if you didn't need me to be a part of whatever is going to go down, so be honest with me."

Shepard began to fidget. She shrugged, shuffled her feet, and wrinkled her beautiful little nose. He hated it when she did that, it made her look so innocent, when all along she was up to no good. The worst part of it was, that what she asked, no matter how ludicrous, he was liable to go along with. She had him completely wrapped around her finger, and she knew it. What the hell had he done to himself?

"It's about getting right," said Shepard.

"What do you mean?" asked Kaidan.

"Ever heard of a place called Omega?" asked Shepard.

"Uh," Kaidan shook his head. "I don't think so… oh wait, I read about this once. It's an Eezo mining colony in deep space, right?"

Shepard nodded, looking up the street at some approaching gang members. "Makes this place look like the Hamptons. It's full of mercs, gangsters, generally it's one of the shittiest places in the galaxy."

Kaidan crossed his arms. "Ok, so, why so interested in it?"

"It's who's there that I'm interested in," said Shepard. "A Batarian who's in a merc outfit operating out of Omega. He's making bank, really well connected."

Kaidan didn't like where this was going. "A well connected Batarian, why are you so interested in him?"

"He commanded the squad that butchered my family," said Shepard.

"Oh, Shepard," said Kaidan, shaking his head. "You don't honestly think…"

"I've got it all set up," she said. "Fake ID's, transportation. I'm selling everything I own to make it happen."

"Jesus, Shepard," said Kaidan. "You know, if you get caught, you can kiss your military career goodbye, right? And that's assuming you don't get yourself killed."

"It doesn't matter," said Shepard. "You have to understand, Kaidan, the shit I went through down there, it's never going to leave me. The things…" she rubbed the scars on her face as if the wounds were fresh. "What they did, I can't let it go, especially not when the fucking bastard is getting fat and rich, becoming some sort of celebrity among his sort, no, I'll never be right if I don't do this. I've got to put him down."

He felt like he was going to be sick. Why did he get involved? "Do you have any idea of what it's like to kill someone, Shepard?" he asked.

She answered flatly, with ice in her tone and murder in her eyes. "I've been trying to imagine it for a while," she said. "But every time I close my eyes, all I see is my brother's body, and my little sister, and my mom, and…" she stopped, practically choking on her grief.

"I've got to make it right," she said. "I'll never be whole again unless I can make it right, but I need help."

"How do you know I won't just take this straight to Anderson?" he asked.

"Because if I know anything about you by now, it's that you'd never stab me in the back," said Shepard.

Kaidan threw his hands in the air. "So, that's what all this is about, trying to figure out a way to get to Omega so you can die at the hands of some seasoned Batarian killer, let him have one final victory over you? Is that what you want?"

"Like I said, Alenko, I need backup, to make sure that isn't what happens," retorted Shepard.

"No way," said Kaidan. "We'd get flagged for sure."

"I have it all arranged," she said. "Fake ID tags, the whole thing. No one will ever know."

Kaidan ran his hands through his hair. "Shit, I can't believe you put me in this position."

"Yea," said Shepard. "It's not my finest moment, but I'm desperate. The ID's make it worse. Don't hate me for it, but I have us booked as a couple on honeymoon."

Kaidan shook his head. "I need a few days to think this over," he said.

"Understand," said Shepard. "I'll give you until Holiday Break, after that, well… I need to plan it out."

They walked the rest of the way in silence. There was no way he could do this, but he was going to do it anyway. Why had she thrown in the bit about being a married couple? Was it deliberate? ' _You're such an idiot_ ,' thought Kaidan.

Of course it was deliberate. She was playing him, had been playing him all along. She was letting him think he had a chance, and worse, he'd already convinced himself of just that. It was part of the trap she'd set, and yet, rather than getting the hell out, he was already leaning towards saying yes. Kaidan had to find out if there was a future here, even knowing that it was doomed from the start. It was a monkey trap, but he couldn't let go of the banana, and she knew it. Damn her.

* * *

 **UP NEXT:** "Transit"


End file.
